Chuck Norris Archives

Ten Guys Conservative Men Want To Make Sweet, Sweet Love With

January 13, 2016

WARNING: The following article contains silly jokes about conservatives not suitable for all audiences. If you’re homophobic, easily offended by jokes of a sexual nature, or not into the homoerotic charms of the men listed below, please read something else to…

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5 ‘Muslim Beards’ That Right-Wing Nut Jobs Would Consider Un-American

December 30, 2015

5 ‘Muslim Beards’ That Would Earn The Ire Of Islamophobic Right-Wingers Yes, ladies and gentlemen, we are definitely sitting on the other side of the looking-glass. Apparently, we really do live in a world where “Muslim beards” are a source of…

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Why Are Republicans Going Nuts? Because Machoism Is Slowly Dying

November 23, 2015

You may not realize this, but our human civilization is moving away from the machoism that has defined our race for so many millennia. The tech-savvy smart guy will, in a matter of time anyway, become more appealing to our…

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Why Are Republican Presidential Candidates Getting Sillier Each Election Cycle?

November 12, 2015

George W. Bush: A Republican presidential candidate you can have a beer with. It was October of 1999, and I was sitting in a dining hall at Binghamton University with a few friends, when I heard someone say something about one…

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Paranoid Former ‘Texas Ranger’ Worried Obama Wants To Invade His State

May 5, 2015

When you’re already dealing with paranoid, overzealous, gun-loving, tea-drinking Republicans, adding a military exercise to the mix is just asking for trouble. Texans, including the governor and now Chuck Norris are in a tizzy over a military training operation called…

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Lunatic Texas Republican: Chuck Norris Should Fight ISIS, Not Obama (VIDEO)

February 13, 2015

Texas GOP Congressman Blake Farenthold doesn’t quite have the notoriety of other deranged Texas politicians such as Ted Cruz, Rick Perry, or Louie Gohmert, but the man is a real piece of work in his own right. And he proved…

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