'Jones'burg Quickly Falls to Dems in First Major Battle of New Civil War

‘Jones’burg Quickly Falls to Dems in First Major Battle of New Civil War

Alex Jones Twitter Civil War

Now We Are Engaged In A Twitter Civil War, Testing Whether That Noblest Platform, Or Any Platform So Conceived And So Dedicated Can Long Endure The Likes of Donald Trump and Alex Jones.

Fireworks have long been a staple of the 4th of July, but explosions of years past have had nothing on the 2018 edition of America’s birthday party. Infowars founder (and admitted fraud) Alex Jones, in an “Emergency Transmission” is warning his followers that the Democrats are planning to start a Second Civil War on Independence Day.

Jones might have mistaken July 4th for December 25th, however, because his declaration was one of the best gifts ever bestowed upon Twitter. The twin hashtags #DemocratCivilWar and #secondcivilwarletters swiftly and courageously emerged organically, dealing Jones and the rest of his rabid following of low-hanging-fruit a stunning defeat in what historians may one day refer to as the first skirmish of the sequel to the War of Northern Aggression, colloquially known as The Battle of Bull Shit.

The battle featured plenty of good-natured self-depreciation about progressive stereotypes: 


But the jabs at Jones’ audience were even better: 

But the letters home are stealing the show…

And congratulations to this user, who dealt the fatal blow to Jonesian forces: 

RELATED: Fox News Celebrates Trump’s North Korea Concessions, Twitter Destroys Them Both

Photo Credit: Infowars News on YouTube; Wikimedia Commons; Public Domain